Thursday, January 7, 2016

The Mirror

Have you looked in a mirror lately? I'm sure we all do a few times a day. Well, in case you haven't noticed, the mirrors, all of them, they lie. They show us wrinkles and spotty skin. Dimples in our legs where toned muscle used to be. A little extra roll on our tummy where that six pack used to be. The mirror shows us our flaws, because that is what we've been taught to see when we look in the mirror. The scales, they lie too. I would throw that thing in the trash. Now. But the mirror, is a reflection of what we are on the outside, but that is not the reflection of our true self. The reflection shows you how tired you are for staying up at night with a sick kid, or getting up early with your husband before he leaves for work. The reflection shows you the lines that grow deeper every time your teenager is out late on winter roads. The reflection that the mirror shows me every morning is a 40 year old, tired mom, who needs more sleep, more coffee and less food. But the mirror lies...

The mirror doesn't show us our value. It doesn't show us the people that we made smile yesterday. It doesn't show us the child that looks at us and thinks we are perfect no matter what. It doesn't show us the grateful husband who appreciates the time we take for him. The mirror doesn't show us the love we feel when our child walks safely in the door. The mirror doesn't show you the string of friendships that value your true self. The mirror doesn't show us the sacrifices we made to earn those wrinkles. The mirror doesn't go past those surface imperfections, but are they really imperfections? I have decided to embrace these lies, these flaws and imperfections. I have decided as a 40 year old mom of three, who works, raises a family, coaches, volunteers, tries to clean house, cook meals and have a social life all at the same time, that I will embrace what the mirror shows me as my flaws. I will savor that last piece of dark chocolate and know that there may be a dimple on my rear end in the morning from it, because I don't want perfection. I want balance.

I want to enjoy my life, not live it trying to maintain everything in perfect order. All that does is stress me out! I want to be healthy enough to live long enough to see grand kids some day (not any day soon...), to travel, to build a tiny vacation home with my dear hubby, to see retirement. I don't need to be 135 lbs and in perfect "shape" or have all my hair in place and makeup on to do any of that. I spent a year trying to be in the best shape of my life, eating clean and all it got me was burnt out. I neglected the other parts of my life. I've decided that I'm okay with only working out 3-4 times a week instead of 5-7 times. I'm okay with a little dark chocolate once in awhile. I'm okay using my lunch break to write, to spend time with friends, or to clean my house, rather than making myself get that extra workout in.

There is no perfect woman in this world. Those that you think are perfect have a whole world of skeletons in their closets. We are not perfect. But the goal is not perfection. The goal is happiness and health, and my happiness doesn't come from being 135 lbs, it comes from taking the time to savor all the little bits of sunshine each and every day. From accepting that it is a fact that I'm getting old, that it is a fact that I may never wear a size 4 jeans again, that it is a fact that I do have wrinkles and dimples (not the ones when I smile)... These traits make each and everyone of us beautiful.

So tonight, when you are brushing your teeth and looking in the mirror. Look past the mirror. Know that YOU. ARE. BEAUTIFUL. That your soul has touched someones; your kindness has helped someone;  your wisdom has taught someone, and your laughter and smile have brightened another's day. Know that beyond the flaws and imperfections that we are all fighting the same fight. We are all seeking happiness and good health. Accept that there will be mistakes and oopsies and binge diet coke drinking (super size is the death of me), but that in the end, if we accept these and don't torture ourselves for these flaws, there will be balance, true beauty and happiness.


Tell another woman today how beautiful she is!