Grandma Bessie the Patchwork Queen

So it's been an emotional week this week, probably just because I'm hormonal, but tears are running like the faucet it seems. It's always the little things. This post alone took me a week to finish. I just couldn't without tears.

Last week my hubby wanted me to try patching his favorite jeans for him. Let it be known, I am not a seamstress. I don't sew. I rarely mend. I'm good at fixing buttons. That's about it. My mom, bless her heart, spent a whole year of girls scouts teaching us to sew. Basically, I know how. I at least know the girl scout basics. I once bought a sewing machine. It was out of the box, and I did attempt to use it to sew patches onto football jerseys for my husbands team. I lasted about 5 minutes before I boxed that baby back up, returned it to Walmart, and headed for moms... That was the extent of my sewing career.

So he asked me to patch a pair of jeans. I said yes because I know how it feels to lose your favorite jeans, but Lord help me... So I reached out to the memories of Grandma Bessie. She was the mend, repair and patch queen. Even if we didn't want jeans patched, because really sometimes holes in your jeans were cool. Nevertheless, they reappeared in our laundry basket entirely hole free. Even in the year of "you girls are now responsible for your own laundry," which basically turned into Grandma waiting till mom was gone and gathering the clothes and still doing our laundry, she really was the best. She fixed holes in socks, in jeans, probably in underwear. There were so many times you would come home and she was in her rocking chair in her room, patching holes.

She was from that generation, growing up in the depression, you saved, you fixed, you reused, before recycling was "in", they recycled. She saved everything from tin foil to pea juice. And, most importantly, she patched jeans. I immediately thought of her when I had this task of patching jeans. Number one, where did she get the patch material? I'm sure she had a secret pile of saved old jeans that were beyond patching. I did not. I had to dig around for an old pair to sacrifice for a patch.

Patch material found and an old pocket sacrificed, I was ready to attempt a patch. But where to begin, where to do the stitching? Are you supposed to see it? Not see it? I didn't have blue thread, because again, I'm not into sewing. I have the basics for button repair. Black thread, white thread and maybe three needles, which I can never find. But I found one, I was ready, ready as I could be anyway.

{The ugly patch job.}

So with the patch somewhat secured, I began the tedious process of patching. Like every other 42 year old out there, my vision is borderline - I might need bifocals - and trying to thread the needle was a process in itself, but I was able to finish one side. Then, looking at the mess in front of me it hit me. I missed it. I missed the chance to sit and watch Grandma sew. All the years, all the hours spent in her room. There were plenty of stories, snacks and sleepovers, but she usually did the sewing alone. I missed it. I never sat and watched, really watched. I never asked the questions. I never let her teach me. I took it for granted that Grandma would always be patching my clothes for me.

And all of a sudden, alone in my kitchen, looking at the stupid pair of jeans, I lost it. Tears... so many tears. I was sobbing. How did I allow myself to miss that chance. Grandma Bessie would have been 100 this year. I hope she is up there sewing heavenly patches and laughing at my horrid attempt at a patch job. But I will learn, I'll get better. Because if Grandma Bessie thought it was important to save, reuse, and patch, then it was important.

I've realized that just like taking for granted that I would always have her to patch when needed, we take so much for granted in this life. If nothing else, I will take time to stop, to learn, to ask the questions. To put my phone down. Read a little more, write a little more, Facebook a little less... Life is too short. And if you have a Grandma Bessie in your life, absorb those moments. Cherish those lessons. Remember those stories. One day it will be all you have. And if you ever need a pair of jeans patched, I am not your woman. But I know a great Grandma you can think of while you learn to do it yourself.

Why the Switch

How many of us have made New Years Resolutions? I know I quit drinking soda in January, and with one back slide (about 1/2 a fountain diet coke) in the last 4 1/2 months, I've done pretty well. 

We have all made "those" resolutions. Eat healthy. Drink more water or green tea, less soda. Workout. I have also purchased safer products for my home. Cleaning products that are non toxic. I use a lot of baking soda and vinegar. I've tried to cut the harmful stuff out of most area of my life. Recently I ordered safe deodorant and charcoal toothpaste for my family (yes, they think I'm crazy). 

But what is scary, is that our SKIN, is our largest organ. And most of the switches I've made, have very little to do with what I put on my skin. Until now... When I signed up with Beautycounter, at first it was because I loved the charcoal bar, and it cleared my adult oily/acne skin up like a miracle. But since January, when I signed up as a consultant, I've been doing more and more research on what our everyday products do when we apply them. Did you know you absorb those toxins pretty much right into your blood stream? Did you know that sunscreen your using may in fact be causing cancer? My niece, very light complexion, very blonde, lived in Arizona almost her entire life. By age 14 she had pre-cancerous skin removed from her face... Her mom lived by sunscreen. Dangers of Sunscreen ... Did you know that companies don't have to tell you what is in their "Fragrance" because it's a "trade secret"... They don't have to tell you. You have no idea what "Fragrance" contains. 

The more I read and watch videos and study up on the chemicals that we are using DAILY, the more I stand behind Beautycounter. And, while I started because I loved their products, I will continue because I LOVE their mission. They are one of the only skin care cosmetic companies that has true transparency. Their ingredients are listed on their website - Ingredients. They have a strict Never List  of ingredients they refuse to use. And they have an active Mission of putting safer products into the hands of every consumer, whether or not they are Beautycounter products, or another brand. The main goal is educating consumers on finding safe products and doing the research when you buy. 

I watched this video again this morning - The Ugly Truth - and I know that I will continue to support this company and their mission. Please take a coffee break and watch this video. I'm not asking you to buy from me, I'm asking you to be informed on the Ugliness of this industry. I'm asking you to read ingredient labels. This industry, being self governed, will not change until the consumers push back enough that they have to. 

#switchtosafer #loveyourskin 

xoxoxo 

Beautycounter

P.s. you can also check your current products here EWG Skin Deep to see what safety rating they have, if the company discloses their ingredients... 

Another Mundane Post

This morning's devotions were on Contentment {Glimpses of Grace: Treasuring the Gospel in your Home, by Gloria Furman}. Where do we find our contentment? What "things" do we base our contentment around? This quote from the devotion really hit home, "Experiencing grace in the mundane is about far more than counting your blessings or being thankful for the life you've been given."  The mundane - meaning "lacking interest or excitement; dull."

Let that soak in a  minute...

...

"Experiencing grace in the mundane is about far more than counting your blessings or being thankful 

for the life you've been given."

I know I'm blessed. I thank the good Lord daily for the numerous blessings I've received. However, I am not sure the last time I felt grace or blessed for doing laundry, doing dishes, picking up the messes for the 50th time for the week. I can't remember the last time I said, "Thank you Lord, and Hallelujah, for giving me cat litter to scoop!" 

I will admit right here and now, that I rarely see the grace and blessing in the mundane. I drag my feet getting out of bed a lot of days, it's another day of the same old thing. Get the kid up, make breakfast, pack lunches, work, answering the phone, doing the mundane at work, doing the little things that I find so aggravating at times, on my lunch I usually do some laundry, get dinner around, scoop the cat litter, take out the garbage, etc... and the day rolls forward in the normal mundane fashion. And rarely, if ever, do I stop mid chore, mid work day, and say "Thank you Lord for chores..."

We thank God for the big things. The roof over our head, the jobs that provide, the food in our fridge, but we don't thank him for the little things that come with keeping that job, paying the bills to keep that home, buying the gas that gets us to the grocery store to buy the food that feeds us. Are you with me? We are grateful for the big picture. We are grateful for families and love, and life and health. We are rarely grateful with the daily grind that makes the rest of those blessings possible. 

How many times have I mumbled under my breath while doing these mundane things? How many times have I ranted out loud that dishes and laundry are NEVER ENDING... How many times have I complained about doing the mundane for the people I love? I have not been grateful. I have not looked for the grace or the blessings while doing the every day mundane chores. If you are like me then more times than not, we complain about the mundane. 

I've been seeing a lot of posts on Lent, today is Fat Tuesday and tomorrow the season of Lent begins. I have never done lent. I was raised Baptist/Bible and we just didn't do that. However, at TVC they have a "Fast Forward" where you don't just give up something, you give up something and you pick something else to do instead. So, this year I will give up Complaining about the Mundane. I will replace it with being Thankful for the Mundane. 

I will be thankful and count the blessings, the little ones. The ones that lead to the big ones. I will be thankful for every interrupting phone call and inconvenience during my work day, because that means I have a job. I will be thankful for the inconvenient requests and chores that I have to squeeze into my schedule for my family, because that means I have a family that relies on me, who I have the amazing opportunity to bless in return by doing these mundane things for them. I will be thankful every time I have to pay a bill, because that means we have income that provides for us. 

The mundane. The mundane is full of grace and blessings. Even though we don't see the boring, non-exciting, little things as full of grace or blessed, they are. Today when you count your blessings, when you look for God's grace, don't look at the big picture. Look for the mundane, and find God's grace and blessings there. 

Blessed

It's been a crazy few days. I've gone from incredible anger, I won't get me started on parents who don't volunteer but want everything under the sun and misplace blame... {end of rant}. Super highs. Happy moments and then down moments. I feel like this last weekend has put me through the tumbler of emotions - and not I am not pms'ing. That just takes chocolate.

At times like this I have to remember some of my favorite verses of Jeremiah...

God has a plan. It is usually not the plan that I think it is. More times than not, disappointment leads to something great. Something I hadn't really expected. I have to remember that HE has a plan. Not my plan, not my will, but His.

Then I have to remember that when I'm looking for His plan, that I need to truly be seeking His plan, "with all my heart". 

I know we all have those moments of sadness, disappointment, failures, and when life just seems like NOTHING is going where you thought it would. But HE holds us safely, holding us for the moment that His plan will be opened to our eyes. You may not be able to see it yet, you might not even be able to fathom it at this point in your life, but there is a plan out there much bigger than you and I can imagine. We just have to put our faith and hope in Him, and seek Him with all our hearts. I have faith that His plan will be revealed, not today, maybe not this year, but if I keep on keeping on... Keep moving forward. Keep looking to Him for my next step. Then I will see the plan.

Troubled Sea

Ran across this video today: Rend Collective "My Lighthouse"

The first line of the song just resonates with me, "In my wrestling, in my doubts, in my failures you won't walk out. Your great love will lead me through. You are the peace in my troubled sea."

So often I am troubled, as life throws all sorts of problems at me. Making adult decisions is something that even for the last 24 years of my actual adulthood, that I so often try to do on my own. I'm stubborn, I'm an introvert. I keep it all bottled up and just surge forward on my own trying to keep my head above water without asking anyone for help or advice. Even God. I let my troubled sea of burdens continue to deluge me with sinking waves.

Yet, even in these times when my sea is troubled, when the waters are rocking my boat, and the life jacket feels just out of reach, there is a light that will guide me safely home. I just have to look. I have to take a pause, a moment to look up from my troubles and lean on someone, to lean on HIM, and to see that He has a light shining for me, leading me home.

It was a good reminder listening to this song this morning that as they lyrics state "I will trust the promise you will carry me safe to shore."

Dear Parents...

Parents of athletes come in all sorts. Lately, I'm frustrated to say, that the bad seem to outweigh the good. Maybe it's because I've been around athletics and parents for over 20 years and sometimes what you see and hear just rubs you the wrong way. So, I'm going to get on a soapbox for a moment...

YOUR KIDS ARE ONLY YOUNG ONCE!  

Yes, I shouted that. Look, parents, I've had two kids graduate already. The time goes by so fast, and once it's gone, it's gone. You can't fix the "would've, should've, could've" that plague your mind. Support your kids now. They want to wrestle, support them. They want to be in band, support them. They aren't sure what they want to do? Help them discover their passions whatever that may be. I am a huge advocate of "just be involved" - whether it's arts, athletics, community, whatever... Keeping kids busy and teaching them life skills, that do not revolve around video games or partying, will help keep them out of trouble. 

Yes, I know that we all have jobs, meetings, deadlines, dinner to fix, groceries to buy, houses to clean, and hobbies of our own, and a negative balance of time once we jam it all in. But, I am here to tell you that staying up till 2 am on a school night while your kid tries to crank out homework, after getting home from a meet or game at 11 pm, is worth it. Traveling all over the state, whether it's once a week or three times a week, is worth it. Getting up at 4 am to get food ready for a table of wrestlers, who will undoubtedly forget to say thank you, driving over an hour to deliver said prepared food, and then sitting in the hard uncomfortable stands all day, to watch him/her maybe wrestle for 3 minutes the entire day.. Yes, let me say it again, IT'S WORTH IT! 

I have watched so many kids go through our programs here. The majority of the parents are supportive, die-hard, do-anything without grumbling parents. Then there's the other 5%, the 5% who want this to be about them, who ruin something their kid actually loves to do, who aren't there to support, but to complain. Please don't be that parent. Please, and yes I am pleading, PLEASE, take a time-out when you want to complain and moan about coaches, parents, kids, travel, or their sport/activity in general. Take a time-out and ask yourself, will saying this help? Will doing/not-doing this be something I regret? 

I know, I've slipped into that category throughout the years. I'm not perfect, there are mornings I just want to sleep, or read, or just clean my house, but I have some 40 years of life or more (hopefully) after my kids are gone, when these days of watching them compete are over. I will have decades to sleep, read and clean. I've sent my older two off (far off) to college already. There are already things I wish I could go back and change, BUT YOU CAN'T. That's life. Life isn't fair. We can't be multiple places at once. We can't pause time or get it back once it's gone. All we can do is live in the moment, and hope that we make the best choices possible for our kids. 

So today, Dear Parents, I'm asking for your help. Let's give these kids a good experience. Let's all be adults and help support them and their passions. Let them see the bonds and experiences that they build in extra-curricular's are important. Let's block the negativity, support the passions, ignite the fire, and build a community of support for them. 

Your's Truly, 

Tired of the Negativity Mom

Searching Still...

As I continue to look for a replacement for Shakeology, I've realized that I really should have done more homework years ago! Although I loved the Beachbody workouts and Shakeology, the cost is really up there! I struggled through a couple of years being successful with Shakeology but not with their programs... This adult ADD sets in and I just cannot complete a program. I get bored. I'd rather run. Walk. Hike. Anything but do the same DVD's for months and months on end.

So now, here I am - better late than never - doing the research. I've found some really good articles. I've tried some bad shakes. Some good shakes.

Results with Thrive. I stopped trying after day three. I only took 1 of their capsules each day instead of 2 but still felt shaky and just like I was "in a funk"... I didn't feel normal and didn't like the three step process. Capsules. Shake. Patch.

I just want an all in one shake that I can replace breakfast or lunch with (since I am the forgetful eater). I want a whole based food shake. I want protein, less sugar and probiotics. Without having to take 2 or 3 products to get it all. Which, was the benefit of Shakeology.

Next up, I tried Juice Plus. I really liked the flavor of the vanilla shake. I didn't care much for the flavor of the chocolate. It just isn't chocolate enough for me. I loved their complete bars and will probably order some to keep on hand for snacking. But, while it's a little bit cheaper than Shakeology it's still up there quite a bit, and it's another MLM company and felt the need to "sign up" to get the discount. But I've decided I'm not doing another company where I feel like I have to sell it in order to afford it.

So, while looking for some other options last night I ran across this one...

Vega One vs. Shakeology. I've ordered my first container of the shake. Pros that I like, it appears to be nutritionally equivalent if not better than Shakeology. It is MUCH cheaper. I can buy it direct, for a low price through Amazon and get free shipping (much love for Amazon Prime), or even find it in local stores (Walgreen, Meijer, Walmart, etc...). This I like. I like that there are options for purchasing rather than being signed up with a company and tied down to a monthly shipment to get the free shipping. I like that it is affordable, yet GOOD. Plus, there are 8 flavors. I may just try them all.

More to come soon after I get to try this new product!